"working on my faults and cracks..."


on my own time

News In Briefs
WYWS Edition

* So we've arrived at a new layout for the blog. Finally stopped tweaking it, so I guess this is where we get off the train.
Anyway, hopefully, future posts will take us toward some semblance of structured thought provocation regarding life in Japan, and the mess that aspiration and direction have become as of late. Until whenever that may be, I'm content making poop jokes and writing vapid posts like this one.

* I'm currently not working very hard on putting together another schizophrenic installment in the Go-En series. I haven't recently had a lot of time to dick around in Okayama with my camera as much as I used to, but a lot of people have been asking for more of me pretending to enjoy life here, so I'm willing to compromise. Besides, I have some sweet unused footage of a Japanese dude wearing a green Borat banana hammock.

* Finally caved and sold back my Guitar Hero III out of pure disgust. Entirely out of protest, I chose not to finish it. And yes, I was only two songs from the end. It became a battle of me versus the shitty craftsmanship on a guitar that worked only 50% of the time. The other 50%, it sabotaged my progress by cutting out on long notes, and not registering on others. It made full combos impossible, and ensured failure against the Lou boss battle (thanks to the idiotic new powerup system).
I suppose I could have taken advantage of the in-box warranty, and gone through another round of Japanese customer service hell for a new one, but I'm done with GHIII and all its hastily tacked-on elements. Thanks to a humiliating note assist system, the contrived boss battles, and the unnecessary in-game sponsorship from Axe deodorant spray, it's the chili cheese skid mark on the otherwise squeaky clean pair of rockstar underpants that is the GH series.
So, I'm already warily looking forward to GHIV and its touted "create a song" features, by which Activision will hopefully rise from the ashes of their shitty craftsmanship and redeem themselves. I'm skeptical though--the magic of the first two games disappeared when Activision realized that from the rock they had just smote, flowed not water, but a raging torrent of cash.

* I'm not sure how hard it's getting pushed in the states, but the anticipation in Japan for Metal Gear Solid 4 is reaching a near-solid state of palpability. Trailers like these are doing little to quell the increasingly cramped quarters in my pants.

* One of the younger, more attractive teachers on our floor has really short hair. It should also be noted that I have a strange attraction to short hair. I pay close attention to these things. So you could imagine my surprise when she showed up one morning early last week, short black hair suddenly having sprouted rogue ponytails. Two of 'em. Smallish buggers--almost as though she had borrowed the "party in the back" section of an adolescent mullet while he slept, then fashioned it into two little extensions. Some days, she wears it. Other days, she ties it into a single tail, and lovingly drapes it over her right shoulder. Still on other days, it's completely gone. Not quite as obvious as a balding man who drops his toupee into a bowl of tomato soup, but still obvious enough for me to keep score on which days she wears them, and which days she does not.
My theory is that it makes her feel young and nubile again, after having just hammered out a 50 pound doodoo machine.

* No, "doodoo" is not hyphenated.
Yes, I checked.

1 contributions to this piece:

Sabelotodo said...

Oh Zach...your blog makes my days. This is Patrick, by the way.

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