"working on my faults and cracks..."

Showing posts with label Reality is a D-Bag. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Reality is a D-Bag. Show all posts

7.25.2007

Resolution


Rejection is always hard to take. But I honestly think it's easier to swallow when it pushes you to the ground and kicks dirt in your face, or bitch-slaps you in the hallway before posting compromising pictures of you on the internet.
The worst rejection is courteous and apologetic: "Let's just be friends," or "We regret to inform you," or anything that precedes "gozaimasen." Always formal and polite; as empathetic eyes fall to the floor, rejection begins with an apology, and ends with a half-baked smile, or a forty degree ojigi.

My own fault though. I should have made plans sooner, shouldn't have banked so heavily on the H.I.S. penguin drones, and should have had a backup. It's probably for the better though. Guitar Hero III drops in November--just in time for Christmas with the family.

On one hand, Hidden in Plain View's premature breakup makes their sophomore release a bittersweet one, seeing as the record was released long after they parted ways. Recorded during the band's final hours, Drive-Thru records has given the band a proper send-off with Resolution. And iTunes has given it to me for free. I guess the reminder of their breakup could be a harder pill to swallow--that is, if this cd was rubbish. But it's not. It's awesome.
It's true though--in life, even when it's over, it should end with a bang, and never a whimper. Even at our very worst, I think everyone deserves their own swan song.

It's h-o-t here. All the petite Japanese women hide under sunbrellas and silk arm sleeves, while the suit & tie samurai desperately mop their foreheads in silent protest. But no one says anything. It's life, and life is uncomfortable in the summer. I take solace in knowing other places around the world haven't been so lucky--especially southern Europe, where sweltering citizens attest they are living in a "free sauna from God."

Fuck, that's pretty hot.

5.23.2007

The DI stops to reflect on patience...gets annoyed


Moving totally sucks. Moving your entire life in boxes is downright painful. But moving just your person, and a life's worth in two suitcases to the other side of the world is goddamn masochistic. With the exception of a stack of t-shirts, my PS3, and a few pairs of shoes, I came to Japan literally, with nothing. 'Nothing', save for the the clothes on my back, the aforementioned shirts, and the prerequisite "heart full of confident dreams."

Well, four months later, the dreams have unhappily shaken hands with my pal Reality, and the suitcase--now less of a suitcase, and more of a makeshift dresser on the floor of my barren apartment. And now that I think of it, starting with nothing in a foreign country is a lot like playing the old SNES classic Super Metroid. Just as you can't get the hyper beam without first having gotten the morph ball, you can't get the Ferarri without first having purchased coat hangers.

See, Super Metroid is a game of patient exploration. Previously inaccessible areas open up with the acquisition of new items, so backtracking is a common gameplay element. Most interesting about the game's structure, is that while the final boss room is only a few map clicks from your initial starting point, the player is not allowed access without having first completed certain key tasks (eg. destruction of a group of space pirate bosses)--tasks that can only be completed with the acquisition of certain items (eg. the varia suit)--items that can only be acquired by first acquiring other items (eg. the ice beam)--other items that can only be acquired through the purchasing and powering on of Super Metroid for the Super Nintendo; and so on, and so forth, ad nauseam.

Which brings me back to my current irritating apartment situation. I am not a patient bounty hunter man. I have a salary, and an empty apartment, and I want to fill it with fifty shades of awesome. I want the varia suit, and I want it today. I want the the grappling hook, the screw attack, and the plasma beam, but all I've got right now is this lame morph ball. Or rather, a schoolteacher's paltry salary with a closet full of coat hangers and a shitty soap dispenser from the 100 yen store. Square freakin' one. Brinstar Landing, 1st save.

Just as I wouldn't want to skip through all of Metroid to get to Mother Brain, I don't wish to skip the entire alphabet in going from 'A' (coat hangers) to 'Z' (personal helicopter pad on the roof of my apartment). Rather, I'm just looking for a way to circumvent the priorities of some of the more mundane physical need purchases (curtains, rugs, lamps, etc.), to get to the more rewarding crap, like cycling gear, PSPs, stereo wattage in triple digits, HDD Handycams, Bravia LCD televisions, and Gundam bunk that transforms into a couch.

Moving abroad and starting over has not so much taught me how to be a more patient person, as it has taught me that old-fashioned virtues like patience still exist, if only to annoy me. This problem is exacerbated by the fact that I only get paid once per month, as opposed to a more optimal situation where my bank account would swell for each melon pan I ate. Which, as of late, would be several times per day. Yes, patience has not been learned in Okayama; I have only learned priority. Priorities justified by need. For example, sleeping on the floor is irritating, but less irritating than an empty stomach, thus; a rice maker is only slightly less important than a refrigerator, but more important than a proper desk or bed, wherein a clean floor will temporarily suffice. I've since worked past the most basic of the aforementioned furniture essentials, and have moved into the boorish realm of maintenance and care of my living space. A broom for the crumbs on the floor, toilet cleaner for back-to-back nights at the izakaiya, and so on. In establishing priorities, once the essential needs have been exhausted by the passing of time, we are granted access to the next level of exploration, or rather, the next tier of priorities--namely, priorities in 1080p.
In conclusion, Samus may have defeated Mother Brain with the almighty hyper beam, but she could not have without first rolling around on the ground with the lowly morph ball. So I will learn to be happy in delaying financing for the construction on my helipad, and settle instead for buying curtains and curtain rods. Furnished apartments be damned, I realized that "Happy Town" is only called so because of the 'apparently' visible ass picnic I host every morning at about 7:50.

So I am still annoyed, and I am still impatient. "You can't have it all at once" has become a mantra for the ages. But at least I understand that just because we can't have our hyper beams now, doesn't mean we won't be able to acquire them later. Patience, glasshopper.

5.22.2007

Back to the mirai



When I watch the sun go down on Okayama, you're fast asleep. Only when my eyelids begin to grow heavy, are you shuffling about your kitchens gathering breakfast, and getting ready for the day. I always wished that being first on the international date line granted its inhabitants uncanny powers to share the future with the rest of the following world. I'd make for the planet's most pompous and unerring meteorologist, or take my gift to the horse race track, and bet it all on every winning horse according to the previous day's newspaper. But reality. Our unfortunate friend Reality.
Dear Mr. Reality

Do you really have to be such a douchebag? Seriously. Some of us think it's a little unnecessary. And grow a fricking sense of humor already. But not a twisted one.

Your Loyal Detractor,

Dagbert

Professionally party pooping since the dawn of time. A classic spoilsport, Mr. Reality ensures that the thrill of being 13 hours ahead is hardly the bees knees--no matter what Auntie so-and-so told you. It makes scheduling phone calls a royal pain in the ass, really short aim conversations, and empty game lobbies. When I'm raring to go, everybody is just crawling out of bed, or already on their way to work. The future is a lonely place.

But there is still hope. So as the sun dips out of sight, bathing my concrete world in darkness, it rises again, on your side--to give you the exact same shot at tomorrow that I had.

Make it count. I promise I won't tell you what happens.


 
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