"working on my faults and cracks..."


Ass-kicking from a boot made of burning meat

I don't usually re-post drivel from other sites, when you could just get off your lazy ass and find it at the source yourself. But this several week-old review of that Frank Miller Greco beat-down flick 300 was just too incredible to pass up. The author's name is Neill Cumpston (bad luck, or the best pseudonymn ever), and I've had a difficult time pinning down exactly who he is, what he does, or where he does it on a regular enough pace to be bookmarked. He has done some other hilarious reviews of Blade II and Dawn of the Dead, respectively. But I haven't seen much else. What I do know however, is that in his review, somewhere between "dudity ass picnic" and the "dick made of three machine guns," I broke my spleen from laughing so hard, and can't find it. The third graders are sweeping the floor now. I think somebody must have sucked it up. Sneak preview:

"Just ass kicking that kicks ass that, while said ass is getting kicked, is kicking yet more ass that’s hitting someone’s balls with a hammer made of ice but the ice is frozen whiskey."


Keep an eye on your spleen. Oh, and you're welcome.

1 contributions to this piece:

Valerie said...

I'm pretty sure "Pause Button" exists under a different name...I've seen it at the adult bookstore.

*grin* That made me giggle.

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