Ass-kicking from a boot made of burning meat

I don't usually re-post drivel from other sites, when you could just get off your lazy ass and find it at the source yourself. But this several week-old review of that Frank Miller Greco beat-down flick 300 was just too incredible to pass up. The author's name is Neill Cumpston (bad luck, or the best pseudonymn ever), and I've had a difficult time pinning down exactly who he is, what he does, or where he does it on a regular enough pace to be bookmarked. He has done some other hilarious reviews of Blade II and Dawn of the Dead, respectively. But I haven't seen much else. What I do know however, is that in his review, somewhere between "dudity ass picnic" and the "dick made of three machine guns," I broke my spleen from laughing so hard, and can't find it. The third graders are sweeping the floor now. I think somebody must have sucked it up. Sneak preview:

"Just ass kicking that kicks ass that, while said ass is getting kicked, is kicking yet more ass that’s hitting someone’s balls with a hammer made of ice but the ice is frozen whiskey."

Awesome.

Keep an eye on your spleen. Oh, and you're welcome.