"working on my faults and cracks..."


Decomposing your stupid opinion

I killed him. Finally.

I really wish I could make this shit up, because if I could, I'd sit in my room all day making up stories about all the insectoid beasts whose asses I kicked. They'd be awesome stories, and I'd be famous. But since I can't, I just have to wait until one of those unsuspecting little wankers makes landfall in my room, to give me anything worth writing about. Not that smashing bugs was ever worth writing about, but hey...

Where was I? Oh yeah, I killed him. Dirk. Huge sonofabitch isn't he? Well he's dead, so it doesn't matter. Or at least his doppleganger is dead. But for all intents and purposes, to allow me to sleep at night, it was Dirk that bit the bullet. Or bit the Nerf dart rather. Either way, there was a projectile hitting him in the kisser. Pretty much the only information worth mentioning. It is seriously incredible how he's there one moment, and in the time it takes me to rinse the toothpaste from my gaping mouth and load my Nerf® gun with a glow-dart, he's gone. Seriously though, I brought the pain. Broke the little guy apart. Kill 'em all, let god sort 'em out is what I say. In the meantime, god has some sorting out to do...

We're entering the latter stages of my PS3 countdown. And by 'latter', I mean 1 month, 19 days, and 7 hours. If you decide to camp out next to me in front of EB, I'm taking my Nerf® widowmaker. Only god and I know what that gun is capable of doing. Oh, and Dirk too. Rest his soul, he also knows.
In other gaming news, Okami is positively beautiful, and further proof of why I love video games. If you read the Pulse, watch for my glowing review of it next week.
Lastly, I'm hearing reports of Guitar Hero II being available on Xbox 360--reports I'm not particularily interested in hearing. What I am particularily interested in however, is this up-and-coming company TAC. Granted, they were sued by RedOctane for basically ripping off GH's concept to make their peripherals. Yes, they won't be up-and-coming anymore if they get bent over by this lawsuit and spanked purple. What matters, is how they've taken the Guitar Hero name, and made some positively sick peripherals for the game. Dorthy, is that a goddamn amp? Yes, mother, I think it is.


1 contributions to this piece:

Valerie said...

HOLY SHIT that fucker's got some long legs. I had several centipedes in my apartment over the summer, including one big enough to scare the cat, but not THAT big!

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